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AN ORK WALKS INTO A BAR

 

Grogg Goes on Vacation. The Bar Industry Will Never Recover.

When an eight-foot Ork warrior in a tie-dye tank top and size 18 flip-flops walks into The Toof & Tonic (Seven Mile Beach’s finest/only establishment), bartender Steeve faces his greatest challenge yet: explaining currency to someone who thinks “WAAAGH!” solves everything.

The Setup: Grogg has decided to take a vacation. No weapons. No war. Just relaxation, tropical drinks, and absolutely no understanding of how bars work.

The Toof & Tonic: A picture-perfect Caribbean beach bar run by: - Steeve: Owner, head bartender, seen everything, transcended jadedness - Chad: Assistant bartender, professional Googler, keeper of the “Wall of Forgotten Tabs” - Ma Jo: Kitchen legend who runs her domain like an ancient warlord

Their drink menu includes legal disclaimers and warnings in three languages.

What Happens When Grogg Arrives: - The bar falls silent - Seagulls flee - Grogg orders drinks without understanding payment - Steeve remains unnaturally calm (years of practice) - Chad stress-Googles “how to serve 400-pound green tourist” - Ma Jo refuses to be intimidated (respects strength, serves accordingly)

The Joy of This Story: Unlike the darker Rogues’ Gallery tales, An Ork Walks Into a Bar is pure comedic gold: - Fish-out-of-water humor (Grogg trying to vacation is adorable) - Service industry recognition (Steeve and Chad are heroes) - Caribbean setting at its best (sunset, salt air, improbable situations) - Character depth (Grogg has layers! Violent, enthusiastic layers!) - Found family moments (the bar staff learn to appreciate their massive green regular)

Best Moments: - Grogg’s first attempt at paying (doesn’t go well) - The flip-flops actively suffering - Ma Jo deciding Grogg is acceptable - Grogg inhaling the ocean air and declaring “DIS IZ PARADISE!” - The Wall of Forgotten Tabs gaining a new entry (in Orkish)

Perfect For: - Service industry workers who’ve seen some things - Warhammer 40K fans who want wholesome Ork content - Beach bar regulars who appreciate the vibe - Anyone who needs a palate cleanser after the darker stories

Tone: This is the Rogues’ Gallery at its most fun—absurd, warm, and genuinely funny without losing its edge.

Availability: An Ork Walks Into a Bar is available now in print and digital formats.

Media Contact: The Rogues’ Gallery press@roguesgallerybooks.com

Website: https://www.caymanmunda.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61578902584912

An Ork Walks Into a Bar: Steeve has dealt with billionaires, fugitives, and hurricanes. An Ork in tourist gear? That’s a new one.

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